The Old Joke Thread

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Purplethistle
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Purplethistle »

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To get to the idiots house.


Q. Knock knock
A. Who's there?
Q. The chicken
"Spits, SLUFS and Rock 'n' Roll"
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Purplethistle
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Purplethistle »

On Facebook recently there was a question, "Who's your favourite Slide Guitarist?"
I only really know of Noddy Holder and Dive Hill!
"Spits, SLUFS and Rock 'n' Roll"
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Purplethistle
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Purplethistle »

During the recent Solar Event, cruise ship passengers in the USA were disappointed by Bonnie Tylers performance to commemorate it as all she did was show nothing but snippets of video from matches at Tynecastle.
"Spits, SLUFS and Rock 'n' Roll"
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AndrewR
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by AndrewR »

Why can't dogs run MRI scans?

Because only catscan
Up in the Great White North
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MarkyM607
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by MarkyM607 »

Golf- what is it good fore!?.
Just thought I'd putt this in here. Iron out the problems and driver home the point!!. Wood you believe I came up with these myself (no shouts of YES, ta!!!).
Got it down to a tee.
:lol:
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!! :lol:
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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MarkyM607
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by MarkyM607 »

Just read a good book on D-Day, says it's written by 'Norman D Landings'.......
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!! :lol:
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Zee28 »

So the doctor gave me the bad news but I wasn't convinced so I asked for a second opinion. He said "OK" and beckoned in a pet cat. The cat looked me up and down then turned to the doctor, shook his head and walked out. I still wasn't satisfied so I asked for a third opinion. "Sure" he said and beckoned in a golden Labrador dog. He sniffed around me, turned to the doctor, shook his head and walked out. I said "What's all this with the pets?" The doctor said "That was your cat scan and lab report....
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Zee28 »

I was in PC World the other day. You really have to be careful what you say in there......
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MarkyM607
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by MarkyM607 »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!! :lol:
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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Clashcityrocker
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Clashcityrocker »

I've just joined the flat earth society.
We've got members all around the globe.

Nigel
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JohnRatzenberger
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by JohnRatzenberger »

I was going to watch the Origami World Championship before it folded but it was only on the Paper View.
John Ratzenberger :???:
It's my model and I'll do what I want with it.
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Clashcityrocker
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Clashcityrocker »

If someone at work hits me with a rhythm stick, is it a workplace Ian Dury?

Nigel
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MarkyM607
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by MarkyM607 »

Oohh boy!! :roll: :lol: . Clever though!!.
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!! :lol:
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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Softscience
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Softscience »

A man walked into a zoo and the only animal they had there was a dog.

It was a shitzu.
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Post by Zee28 »

The umbrella was supposed to be named, simply, Brella.

But the chap who named it hesitated before he said it......
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