Arcwelder wrote:How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb? (2/3)
Six. One to change the bulb, the other five to talk about "How much better Neal Peart would have done it, maaaan"
ROTFLMAO! The Old Joke Thread
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
ROTFLMAO! -
Zee28
- Modelling Gent and Scholar
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
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Stuart
- Raider of the Lost Ark Royal
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
Zee28 wrote:Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Stuart Templeton I may not be good but I'm slow...
My Blog: https://stuartsscalemodels.blogspot.com/
My Blog: https://stuartsscalemodels.blogspot.com/
Re: The Old Joke Thread
Apologies if this has been done before but here goes...
It's a few days before Christmas and Santa is checking over the sleigh, the reins and harnesses and the general condition of the Reindeer. Satisfied with all this he hooks everyone up to the reins, harnesses and the like, secures them to the sleigh and does one last walk around. Suddenly he notices a man approaching carrying a clipboard and looking 'very official'.
"Who are you?." Santa asks.
"I'm from the CAA (or FAA if you prefer!!), I'm here to do a pre-flight check over of your equipment and yourself before your flight time."
"Okay." Says Santa. The man goes around everything, repeating what Santa has just done and making notes. Once satisfied he turns to Santa.
"Okay, shall we go for a test flight, see how your piloting skills are, whether you're ready?."
"Certainly" Santa says climbing into the sleigh. As he does so the man joins him and Santa, with some alarm, notices the man has a shotgun. "What's that for?."
"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you this really, but your about to lose an engine on take-off."
It's a few days before Christmas and Santa is checking over the sleigh, the reins and harnesses and the general condition of the Reindeer. Satisfied with all this he hooks everyone up to the reins, harnesses and the like, secures them to the sleigh and does one last walk around. Suddenly he notices a man approaching carrying a clipboard and looking 'very official'.
"Who are you?." Santa asks.
"I'm from the CAA (or FAA if you prefer!!), I'm here to do a pre-flight check over of your equipment and yourself before your flight time."
"Okay." Says Santa. The man goes around everything, repeating what Santa has just done and making notes. Once satisfied he turns to Santa.
"Okay, shall we go for a test flight, see how your piloting skills are, whether you're ready?."
"Certainly" Santa says climbing into the sleigh. As he does so the man joins him and Santa, with some alarm, notices the man has a shotgun. "What's that for?."
"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you this really, but your about to lose an engine on take-off."
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!!
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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iggie
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
Excellent!MarkyM607 wrote:Apologies if this has been done before but here goes...
It's a few days before Christmas and Santa is checking over the sleigh, the reins and harnesses and the general condition of the Reindeer. Satisfied with all this he hooks everyone up to the reins, harnesses and the like, secures them to the sleigh and does one last walk around. Suddenly he notices a man approaching carrying a clipboard and looking 'very official'.
"Who are you?." Santa asks.
"I'm from the CAA (or FAA if you prefer!!), I'm here to do a pre-flight check over of your equipment and yourself before your flight time."
"Okay." Says Santa. The man goes around everything, repeating what Santa has just done and making notes. Once satisfied he turns to Santa.
"Okay, shall we go for a test flight, see how your piloting skills are, whether you're ready?."
"Certainly" Santa says climbing into the sleigh. As he does so the man joins him and Santa, with some alarm, notices the man has a shotgun. "What's that for?."
"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you this really, but your about to lose an engine on take-off."
Best wishes
Jim
If you can walk away from a landing, it's a good landing. If you use the airplane the next day, it's an outstanding landing
"Never put off till tomorrow, what you can do the day after tomorrow"
Jim
If you can walk away from a landing, it's a good landing. If you use the airplane the next day, it's an outstanding landing
"Never put off till tomorrow, what you can do the day after tomorrow"
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
I was doing some 'What-if' modelling the other day, mixing kits, I mixed an aeroplane kit with a figure of a magician.
I made a flying sorcerer.
I made a flying sorcerer.
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
I was well pleased, I finished a Junior Starter Kit in only three weeks.
I was dead impressed with my speed because on the box it said 8-12 Years.
I was dead impressed with my speed because on the box it said 8-12 Years.
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Stuart
- Raider of the Lost Ark Royal
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
@Zee... oh dear...
Stuart Templeton I may not be good but I'm slow...
My Blog: https://stuartsscalemodels.blogspot.com/
My Blog: https://stuartsscalemodels.blogspot.com/
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Kitaholic
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
The New Labour Party
Tom Watson is Deputy Leader.
Jeremy Corbyn is leader
So it's undeniable and official.
The Labour party is now run by –
Tom & Jerry.
Tom Watson is Deputy Leader.
Jeremy Corbyn is leader
So it's undeniable and official.
The Labour party is now run by –
Tom & Jerry.
Regards
Gord
Desperately trying to find his MOJO, don't know where I left it
Gord
Desperately trying to find his MOJO, don't know where I left it
Re: The Old Joke Thread
A lawyer opens the door of his Porsche and a passing car rips it clean off. The lawyer calls the police and when they arrive an officer says to him "you lawyers are all the same, materialistic. you complain that your expensive car has been damaged and you don't even notice your arm has been ripped off'' To that the lawyer replies "HO MY GOD, WHERE'S MY ROLEX?"
All the best.
Greg
All the best.
Greg
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
Albert Einstein
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
Albert Einstein
Re: The Old Joke Thread
Nice one, those made me smile, thanks Kit and Gregers for that!.
Hoping to return to modelling sometime this year!!
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
Owner of Marky's Model Emporium since 2013!.
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AndrewR
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
Christmas cracker joke:
Q: What sort of pants do clouds wear?
A: Thunderwear
Q: What sort of pants do clouds wear?
A: Thunderwear
Up in the Great White North
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Zee28
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards.
(Sorry)
Santa walking backwards.
(Sorry)
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AndrewR
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
Ah Ah Ah!Zee28 wrote:What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards.
(Sorry)
Up in the Great White North
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Clashcityrocker
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Re: The Old Joke Thread
I see what you did there, despite my hangover this morning, or as I call it, 'The Wrath Of Grapes'AndrewR wrote:Ah Ah Ah!Zee28 wrote:What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards.
(Sorry)
Nigel