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Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: September 6th, 2017, 10:48 am
by Purplethistle
Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To get to the idiots house.


Q. Knock knock
A. Who's there?
Q. The chicken

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: September 6th, 2017, 10:50 am
by Purplethistle
On Facebook recently there was a question, "Who's your favourite Slide Guitarist?"
I only really know of Noddy Holder and Dive Hill!

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: September 6th, 2017, 10:55 am
by Purplethistle
During the recent Solar Event, cruise ship passengers in the USA were disappointed by Bonnie Tylers performance to commemorate it as all she did was show nothing but snippets of video from matches at Tynecastle.

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: September 10th, 2017, 6:19 pm
by AndrewR
Why can't dogs run MRI scans?

Because only catscan

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: September 25th, 2017, 2:13 pm
by MarkyM607
Golf- what is it good fore!?.
Just thought I'd putt this in here. Iron out the problems and driver home the point!!. Wood you believe I came up with these myself (no shouts of YES, ta!!!).
Got it down to a tee.
:lol:

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: October 14th, 2017, 2:01 pm
by MarkyM607
Just read a good book on D-Day, says it's written by 'Norman D Landings'.......

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: October 31st, 2017, 6:36 am
by Zee28
So the doctor gave me the bad news but I wasn't convinced so I asked for a second opinion. He said "OK" and beckoned in a pet cat. The cat looked me up and down then turned to the doctor, shook his head and walked out. I still wasn't satisfied so I asked for a third opinion. "Sure" he said and beckoned in a golden Labrador dog. He sniffed around me, turned to the doctor, shook his head and walked out. I said "What's all this with the pets?" The doctor said "That was your cat scan and lab report....

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: October 31st, 2017, 6:38 am
by Zee28
I was in PC World the other day. You really have to be careful what you say in there......

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: October 31st, 2017, 2:50 pm
by MarkyM607
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: November 1st, 2017, 7:34 am
by Clashcityrocker
I've just joined the flat earth society.
We've got members all around the globe.

Nigel

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: April 1st, 2018, 12:57 am
by JohnRatzenberger
I was going to watch the Origami World Championship before it folded but it was only on the Paper View.

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: April 1st, 2018, 3:24 am
by Clashcityrocker
If someone at work hits me with a rhythm stick, is it a workplace Ian Dury?

Nigel

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: April 1st, 2018, 2:03 pm
by MarkyM607
Oohh boy!! :roll: :lol: . Clever though!!.

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: April 5th, 2018, 12:32 am
by Softscience
A man walked into a zoo and the only animal they had there was a dog.

It was a shitzu.

Re: The Old Joke Thread

Posted: April 5th, 2018, 3:00 am
by Zee28
The umbrella was supposed to be named, simply, Brella.

But the chap who named it hesitated before he said it......